Aiming for perfection makes perfect sense for
doctors performing surgery, engineers designing an airplane, and anyone working
in life and death situations. For most
of us, our day-to-day work doesn’t include those implications.
We strive for success in our respective pursuits
but seeking perfection isn’t the best approach. Psychology Today calls
perfectionism “a trait that makes life an endless report card on
accomplishments or looks” and “a fast and enduring track to unhappiness.”
Perfectionists fear making a mistake might cause
others to think poorly of them, get them fired, or any other plethora of
negative outcomes. This obsession with perfection creates an unachievable
standard and a toxic focus on failures.
Experts have found that perfectionists are made
not born. It starts at an early age, and unfortunately, demand is on the rise. Parents
are increasingly insisting on perfectionism from their children and seeking
status from their kid’s performance.
In The Perfect Lap. Ella’s parents expect
Ella to be perfect. Ella puts undue pressure on herself in an ongoing attempt
to meet their expectations. That is, until she learns another way. Below is an
excerpt from The Perfect Lap where AJ shares his views on perfectionism
with Ella and the kids they are fostering:
“My granddad taught me there’s no such thing as a perfect lap. He
always said that I should give every race my best attempt, and the rest of it
would find a way.” AJ shifted his gaze between the
kids and Ella, who looked every bit as enthralled as the kids. That pleased him
because his granddad’s wisdom was for her as much as it was for the kids. In
some ways, it was even more important for Ella.
“So, you won even though you didn’t have a
perfect season?” Madison asked.
“Darlin’,” he drawled, making Madison blush,
“last season was so far from perfect you can’t even imagine. I lost my ride in
April—”
“Huh?” Zach scratched his head.
AJ chuckled. “I got fired from my race team.”
The kids were obviously shocked by his
admission. Zach’s eyes popped, Madison sucked in a sharp breath, and Kayla’s
mouth dropped open. Ella also looked surprised. Knowing Ella, she had
thoroughly researched him and knew his history. Her surprise was likely
associated with his admission of imperfection. But he wanted the kids and Ella to learn what he had learned—you don’t need to be perfect to be successful, you need to be persistent.
“Yep, I got fired. I sat out for two races
before Davey asked me to join Team Johnson.” He smiled at the attentiveness he
had from Madison, Kayla, Zach, and Ella. “Throughout the season, I led a lot of
laps and I sucked in a lot of laps, too.”
The girls giggled.
“I did what my granddad taught me—I tried my
best each and every lap. Sometimes I won. Sometimes I didn’t, but I
still accumulated a lot of points. Other times,
despite my best efforts, I didn’t do well at all.” He slid his gaze between the
kids and Ella. “When that happened, I told myself it was okay, that I’d do
better the next time.” He leaned in toward Zach. “You know what? I always
did.”
Let’s take a pointer from AJ and not buy into the pressure from
society, our family, friends, and even ourselves. As Leo Tolstoy wrote in Anna Karenina, “If
you look for perfection, you’ll never be content.”
This blog was written by Sedona Hutton, author of contemporary romance and women’s fiction blended with new age spirituality.
Nora’s Promise, A Racing Hearts in Serenity Romance— Reader's Favorite 2019 Bronze Contemporary Romance winner and 2019 NIEA Bronze winner: She trusts animals more than men. He races through women like checkered flags. Can one orphaned boy bring them both to the finish line? https://amzn.to/2OktquX
Nora’s Promise, A Racing Hearts in Serenity Romance— Reader's Favorite 2019 Bronze Contemporary Romance winner and 2019 NIEA Bronze winner: She trusts animals more than men. He races through women like checkered flags. Can one orphaned boy bring them both to the finish line? https://amzn.to/2OktquX
The Perfect Lap, A Racing Hearts in Serenity Romance—2019 Reader’s Favorite Contemporary Romance Finalist: His job is to drive fast. Hers is to put the brakes on him. When sparks fly, will love cross the finish line? https://amzn.to/2VkXIkv
Cloud Whispers—2019 IPPY Bronze winner for Visionary Fiction. The daughter she gave away. The family she always wanted. The journey to redefine her fate….https://amzn.to/2IZ6DRc
To sign up for Sedona’s Peace, Love, & Joy blog newsletter, please click here: https://www.sedonahutton.com/ (No spam—ever!)
The Ten Commitments by Dr. David Simon: https://amzn.to/2UEH0J2
The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire by Deepak Chopra: https://amzn.to/2C9BF5k
Disclosure: The above links to recommended books are affiliate links. If you buy the book through these links, I receive a small commission on the sale. I’ve recommended these books because they’ve been meaningful to me personally and not because of the affiliate program. However, from a legal perspective, I need to identify these as affiliate links.
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