Most
people respond more positively to a positive message. This is especially true—and
especially important—for children who are continually learning and absorbing
information like a sponge. The good news is that we can re-word almost anything
into a positive statement.
Why
is positive messaging so important? Lisa Hayes explains it perfectly:
This idea aligns with the
Law of Attraction, a universal law embraced by spiritualists and physicists
alike. I could write an entire book on the LOA, but as it relates to positivity:
If our thoughts, words,
and actions are positive, we attract more positive things into our lives. If
our energy is negative, we attract more negativity into our lives.
“Loving
or hating the life you are living is solely all in your repeated self-talk.”―
The concept of positive self-talk is touched on in my
contemporary romance, The Perfect Lap.
Ella and AJ unexpectedly join forces to co-foster three children and quickly
learn they’re out of their league. They attend a New Age Parenting class, and
one of the topics covered is redirecting self-talk from negative to positive.
Below is an excerpt from The Perfect Lap which explains
this concept:
“Next, we’re going to talk about redirecting
self-talk from negative to positive,” Adrian said. He glanced around the room.
“Let’s use a few examples. Anyone want to offer up some negative talk you’ve
heard from your kids?”
“I’m stupid,” a man in the front row said.
“Ah, yes.” Adrian gave a wry smile. “A classic.”
He walked to the flip board and wrote, Root Cause. “I’m going to give examples
of redirecting, but make sure you understand the reason why your child is
feeling the way he or she is feeling. If the redirect is a generic platitude,
it won’t work. If your child got a D on his test, you could say something like,
‘You’re smart. I struggled with Algebra, too. I always had to study extra hard
to get good grades in my math classes.’ ” Adrian walked around the room. “If
you don’t know why your child is feeling mad, sad, or whatever, ask her what’s
going on. That will allow you to validate her feelings, empathize, and then
customize your redirect.” Adrian gave a few more examples before wrapping up.
“That’s it. Easy-peasy, right?”
Below are two additional
examples of redirecting self-talk from negative to positive:
Instead of, “I messed this
up. I’m an idiot!”…How about: “It’s okay. It gave you the opportunity to learn
and you’ll do better next time.”
Instead of, “I don’t have
any friends,”…Reframe to show examples: “Lisa helped you with your homework
yesterday…You helped Scott on the playground at recess. You joined the reading
club and met a lot of new kids.”
This blog was written by author Sedona Hutton, blending
contemporary romance and women’s fiction with new age spirituality.
The
Perfect Lap— 2019 Reader’s Favorite Contemporary Romance
Finalist: His job is to drive fast. Hers is to put the brakes on him.
When sparks fly, will love cross the finish line? Purchase link: https://amzn.to/2VkXIkv
Cloud
Whispers—The daughter she gave away. The family she always
wanted. The journey to redefine her fate… To purchase this mind-expanding,
award-winning novel, please click here: https://goo.gl/N9aC38
To sign up for Sedona Hutton’s Peace, Love, & Joy blog newsletter,
please click here: https://www.sedonahutton.com/
Recommended
Reading:
No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to
Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by Daniel J.
Siegel: https://amzn.to/2KF9Iqi
Disclosure: The above links to recommended books are affiliate links. If
you buy the book through these links, I receive a small commission on the sale.
I’ve recommended these books because they’ve been meaningful to me personally
and not because of the affiliate program. However, from a legal perspective, I
need to identify these as affiliate links.
